I’m a little bit rock and roll. Correction: I’m approximately 80% classic rock/alternative/indie rock, 15% hip hop, and 5% country. Yes, I just rechecked my math to make sure that equaled 100%. I recently had the chance to satisfy my 5%, as I was invited to a Carrie Underwood concert for my friend Sabrina’s birthday.
Growing up in the Central Valley there really is no way to avoid country music. Like it or not I drive past the KAT Country water tower fairly regularly, reminding me all too often of my roots. One of my friends is bound to be playing some Garth Brooks while I am in the vehicle. These two facts plus my useless antenna, have forced me to listen to a little more country than I would like to admit.
My old antenna was stolen when we lived in Modesto. You will be pleased to know that there are no robberies to report of here in the sweet town of Ripon. Danny replaced it with some ridiculous looking antenna called the “Euro.” I am not a fan. It picks up 4 radio stations. The four radio stations it picks up are The Hawk, Kat Country, KHOP, and B 92.9. The Hawk plays classic rock, which I enjoy. B 92.9 plays pseudo alternative music which is okay at times, but if I have to hear another depressing Chris Daughtry song I will scream… or change the station. KHOP is also okay at times, however I could do without Ryan Seacrest being one of the DJs. Kat Country is self explanatory. I suppose I could just keep the radio tuned into the Hawk at all times, but the problem with classic rock stations is that it takes a really long time for any new tunes to show up. I guess becoming a classic takes a while. So in desperation…and because sometimes I get tired of my CDs…I find myself tuning into Kat Country.
Because of all this country music listening going on, I find myself knowing the words to various honky tonk songs about fishing and big green tractors.
With all that being said, I was still slightly ashamed to admit that I was excited about Carrie Underwood. I was excited for multiple reasons. The obvious reason was to celebrate Sabrina’s birthday. Secondly, my best friend Casie was going to be there and we always have a fun time together. Thirdly, is because of Carrie’s popularity and my antenna dilemma, I know the words to many of her songs.
When we arrived at the concert I noticed multiple things that may or may not be unique to a country music concert. There were cowboy hats and boots everywhere. At first glance I was a little jealous because I felt like these people knew something more about being country than I did. Then we got inside the venue and the air conditioning was not on. It happened to be one of those ridiculously hot 100 degree days outside. My 5% country soul smiled from within… as I was in flip flops and had my hair in a nice cool bun.
I also noticed a lot of shiny things. The rap world thinks it is legitimate with its “bling” but it has nothing on a female country super star. Everything had diamonds on it, perhaps they were faux, but it has the same effect. Carrie’s microphone, her stand, her shoes, her dress, literally everything was sparkling. It was like a rapper and a blonde desperate housewife had a baby.
When listening to the lyrics of a country song many life lessons can be learned. Billy Currington was the opening act for Carrie Underwood. He sang the most profound lyrics of the night.
Here are some of his lyrical lessons:
“God is great, Beer is good, People are crazy. “
I learned that in order to win a man’s heart I should take notice of his dog:
“He never tells me that he's sick of this house
He never says why don’t you get off that couch?
He don’t cause me nothin when he wants to go out
I want you to love me like my dog”
Another tip from Billy:
“A bad day of fishin beats a good day of anything else”
Now for some life lessons from Carrie Underwood:
I learned that if I go to Las Vegas I better watch out because I may randomly marry a stranger, Britney Spears style, and not know my last name. Good thing Danny is around.
“It started out, "Hey cutie where are you from?"
And then it turned into, “Oh no what have I done?”
And I don’t even know my last name”
I learned to watch out for those “Cowboy Casanovas” because:
“He’s a devil in disguise, a snake with blue eyes”
Based off this song I learned that if a man cheats on a lady it’s okay to vandalize his vehicle:
“I dug my key into the side
Of his pretty little souped-up four wheel drive
Carved my name into his leather seats
I took a Louisville slugger to both head lights
Slashed a hole in all four tires
And maybe next time he’ll think before he cheats”
|Carrie's flying pick up truck|
|Carrie on the big screen|
|Casie, Jessie, Sabrina|